Working as a mascot in the heat of the summer has to be one of the least desirable jobs imaginable. Are there worse jobs out there? Sure, but when coming up with a list of the worst jobs in 100-degree weather, it doesn't take long for you to land on ‘dancing around in a mascot suit for strangers.'
But what if I told you there was booze involved?
Not for consuming, although I'm sure it happens, but for spraying all over your body so you don't smell like the bottom of a dumpster behind a McDonald's in Panama City Beach.
According to Tom Burgoyne, the right-hand man to the Phillie Phanatic, a simple cocktail of vodka and water is the newest fad in keeping mascots from smelling.
"Now a big thing in the mascot world is vodka and water," Burgoyne told CBS News. "You put it in half-and-half, maybe a third vodka, the rest water, you put it in a squeegee bottle, and you can spray your head that way and sometimes that takes the smell away."
As Burgoyne explains it, the spraying of the water-vodka mix on the person's head inside the mascot suit is for their own nostrils, and not necessarily the suit itself and the stench it may give off around the thousands of fans it comes in contact with each and every game.
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If we're using cheap vodka to mask the stench inside of the mascot suit, there is truly no telling just how bad things smell inside the thing.
As for the suit itself, which weighs 35 pounds according to Burgoyne, it is not ventilated, nor does it have any built-in fans to circulate air around.
We're talking about some poor soul trapped inside of a 35-pound suit just sitting in completely still hot air for lengthy periods before they can run off, hide, and rip the mascot's head off for a bit of fresh air.
Mascots, especially those who perform outdoors, may just be some of the hardest-working people in sports, and happen to get through the day with the help of vodka, not unlike plenty of other regular civilians out there.
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